Thursday, March 31, 2011

What is this feeling?

Okay, so it might have taken a few glasses of wine to get to this point, and a few renditions of Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream" (don't judge!) but for the first time in a long time, sitting here with Alix, not having work tomorrow, I feel...happy. 

I am on a constant roller coaster of emotions these days: I know that in a month, things will be settled into a new routine and I'll feel better, but since I hate change, these next few weeks are going to be a nightmare for me.  I go from being excited about my three new boys to crying over leaving my little guy.  I'm thrilled by all the responses I'm getting to the ads I have posted on caregiver websites for a second part-time nanny position, but I'm simultaneously terrified by all the change that is rapidly taking over my life right now.  In a matter of weeks, it's likely that I won't be working for either of my current jobs anymore and I'll become a member of two completely new families, with new little ones to love and new routines to get used to. 

But tonight, I'm going to enjoy my wine, my bad taste in pop music, and the chance to sleep in tomorrow.  Hey, it's the little things, right? 

A happy memory: the last day of vacation before my senior year of college started, my best friends and I went to the local butterfly conservatory and had a blast.  I felt like a kid again, trying to stand so still so the butterflies would land on you.

5 comments:

Sarah said...

No judging on your music choice - I love that song but only when sung by the Warblers. As a matter of fact, I prefer all of my pop music through a Glee filter...

Margaret said...

I love that song!

Cait said...

Sarah, you might be disappointed in me for admitting this, but I've never watched Glee. So I'll take your word for it that its version is better.

And Margaret, thank you for agreeing me. Being well-educated feminists does not mean we cannot enjoy horribly anti-feminist music.

Maria-Fátima said...

I loved that day!!!!

Alix said...

Me too Fatti! Except when that butterfly landed on me. kind of put a damper on it. And when you got attacked by all of the butterflies because of your sexy scent.